I had a dream where there was something in our culture existed that everyone else loved but I hated. It was a combination of World of Warcraft, Game of Thrones and Settles of Catan – some sort of fantasy thing that at any given time seemed to be a different kind of media. I remember I hated it so intensely that it made me perpetually angry. Everything that reminded me of it sent me into a miserable rage. I wanted so much to destroy it, to diminish it in people’s eyes, because it made me an outcast in a way that I could not comprehend.
I was a boy wizard going to a wizard school. The dream was certainly Harry Potter inspired, but the school and its staff more resembled schools from my life and from other fiction than from the HP universe.
I was accused of a particular crime by a faculty member that I never knew what it was. It was a crime so severe, and the accusing authority was so trusted, that my fate to be punished for it was absolute. Nobody believed in my innocence, including my (not IRL) parents, who were part of the process for conditioning me for my punishment. I got this sense that my crime was not one of doing but one of being – like perhaps I was discovered to be the reincarnation of some evil demon or whatever.
People pitied me more than anything. They did not hate me, but I could not run free, and while my parents and others empathized, they were certain of my guilt and would not allow me to roam freely.
There was a city on a plateau that became a very pointed cliff overhang on one side. Passing through that tip was a massive tower, which appeared to have been assembled randomly. It was dotted with doors, staircases, pillars, all kinds of things, made out of all kinds of materials. The town was much the same, though generally made of wood and ropes and things. Had the feeling of a desert island home built from flotsam and jetsam as seen in so many castaway movies.
January 20th, 2002
One of my sisters (kinda vague which one) and I were pulling up to what was supposed to be mom and dad’s new house, I guess. She was talking about how she wanted to get another cat for them and I was arguing that it was a bad idea because the place was full of twisty roads and cats could get run over. We decided that a dog was best, and besides that’s what dad asked for. The neighbourhood had white fences and houses everywhere, but it was just a little odd in that there was a complete lack of order or geometry.
January 6th, 2002
I have been having a number of interesting dreams as of late, but I haven’t been keeping very good track so some things are unclear. By far the most interesting was the one in which I met up with KA [daughter of a family friend who went to my school in England and was two or three years younger than I]. She was older and hotter and we ended up having sex, or at least we started going at it, me on top her on the bottom, but I decided it wasn’t the best time or the best place cuz I had a dim notion that the McN kids were in the room, at the age they were at in Germany. Kinda weird person to have that kind of dream about, makes me feel a ped but it is only a dream and anyway she was older than when I knew her. It was one of the few sex dreams I’ve had that wasn’t weird or awful. Anyway we ended up having to wander around looking for food, because, predictably enough, we were in an apocalyptic city ruin. There was a food/supply pile next to a little river in one part of town that was where we were going to get food – I don’t know how the food got so concentrated in that area. Then a gang came along, and we kinda backed off. The premise of most of this dream was us wandering around trying to find a place to get it on, with the obligatory apocalypse and zombies. It’s a recurring characteristic – almost as if Dawn of the Dead forever affected the way my subconscious mind works. Scary. I suspect KA was brought to mind by the fact that I saw her on a Christmas card and me remembering where all my old GB games went now that I have the GBA. I would have much preferred it if something like this came out of randomness instead. [I had given all my Gameboy games to KA several years prior, when I thought I was growing out of them.]